And how to be that best friend to you..
For most of my life I spent little time alone. I grew up here in the Upper Valley as #10 of 11 children and in my early 20's set forth to raise my own family. As my youngest child reached adulthood, I came full circle and returned to this area to assume the role of helper for my elderly mother. All in all, it has been a wonderful life, brimming with relationship and learning.
then, over the course of a year, my mother passed away, my relationship ended and
my best ever feline friend, Mr Mitzi, died.
adjusted. It wasn't that I minded, most of the time, spending time
alone. It's just that I had never learned to live for myself. Without
someone else to cook for, I often didn't bother to eat properly. Without someone to
do something with, I quite often just - didn't.
one hot July day all that changed.
sun beat down on my back as I pulled weed after weed from my
vegetable garden. The sweat beaded on my brow and ran down into my
rubbed the sweat out of my eye with the back of a dirty hand, looked
down the long row of green beans that loomed ahead and said to
really. Just get this row weeded and then get something to drink.”
then a thought flickered in my mind.
HE were here and said he was thirsty, what would you do?
would have insisted that HE come right away from there and sit in a comfortable chair in the
shade while I went to the house to gather tall glasses of iced tea
and a plate of cookies. And the hot chore would become a wonderful little party
in the shelter of a large maple tree.
would I treat myself any differently?
I sat with that question, I realized that it is easier for me to be
good to others where, for myself, I might not bother. And so it is, I now regularly ask myself,
If my best friend were here, right now, expressing this need or wish or desire, what would I do?
And I do it for myself.
Because I deserve
it. Because being good to myself is so much fun!
Because I have more to give to others when I am taking good care of myself.
challenge you to give it a try.